I Think I am Afraid to Love

I had it all in my previous relationship: a man I thought I loved (and thought he loved me), a loving home, a shared car & a our own family with multiple puppies. We treated each other like kings from dinner dates, brunch with his friends, parties, volunteering at different LGBTQ events, & love notes to remind each other how much we love each other. We did everything together when he wasn't working & there would be times we'd do things at his place of work because he worked for our community. 

Dear Black, Gay Men,

I am deeply apologetic about not honoring your brokenness. It has been awhile since I have really set with all that comes with being black and gay. I have accepted your love as a requirement versus a privilege. I have looked at you just as much of a fetish as a white man looking for a big, black cock; not being able to articulate my admiration from your sense of showing up without minimalizing it as a sexual attraction.

Questions as I Bang His Boyfriend

First, I will say sex is an analogy of life. In this article, I am both literally and figuratively talking about sex. So, here goes.

My moral compass has changed drastically. Back in the day, being the other dude was nothing for me. Now, I have an expectation of myself to preserve my karmic energy and exist in a space of peace-- which simply means not knowingly fucking someone's man. 

BackPage Chronicles II: It's is a Cop-Out- Interview with Tyrice Black

Sex working is a glamourized business in the gay and trans communities. I did an article a couple months ago with Dominique Alford that depicted his journey through escorting, but this guy I talked with today had a very interesting experience that resonated with me. His name is Tyrice Black. I have known Tyrice since he was maybe 18 or 19 and he is a cool kid that came from not ever being around gays to being engulfed in the community overnight-- literally. 

I'm Finally Transitioning

This blog post is a part of my ever evolving truth and a small account of my life over the last 12 months.  This is a piece about my budding transition and how I have arrived at this place in my life. I imagine this to be hard to read for some as it will mean the death of the idea they have created of me in their heads. 

Finding my Oshun, Feeling my Fish

It's the weekend. You've gone to the club, the house is clean and there's no one home. So what do you do? Whip out your phone and log onto the apps. Oh, the choices! A4A, Jack'd, Surge. Which one to choose from?  Your profile along with your milkshake is going to bring all the boys to the yard. In less than an hour, the man of your dreams will be at your door and hopefully, your bed.

40, Double Degreed and HIV Positive

Today is World AIDS Day.

I have been living with HIV for 16 years. When I was diagnosed at 22 years old, I didn't think I would see my 30’s. Here I am looking forward to turning 40 years old next year and looking forward to living another 40 years. I've graduated with 2 degrees and now working on a Doctorate program.

Feel the Flame: Interview with Flame Monroe

I was first memorably introduced to Flame Monroe while watching a preview of a video on the internet talking about the possibility of her getting a Reality TV Show. The show was based on her living her life as a man during the day to care for her kids and participate in school activities with her young children and being a professional female impersonator at night.

Sex, Love and HIV

Several years ago, I met a man from Atlanta, Georgia and progressively fell in love. Our interaction was infectious from the beginning. He was charming, fair skinned, with hazel eyes, and appeared to be honest and forth-coming about his passions and past, and seemingly was eager to start a new life with someone new and I wanted that someone to be me.

Dear Black Transgender Sisters,

I apologize that we, gay black men, are sometimes no better than the rest of the world. That we treat you all like accessories, and wear you out and about, after 5 in the club but aren't there when it matters most. That we only respect your transitions if you meet our standards of beauty and femininity.